


The moments our souls die in

by Twilight_Shadow_Songs



Series: Rocky Redemption [2]
Category: DC Animated Universe, Justice League & Justice League Unlimited (Cartoons), Young Justice
Genre: Angst, Apokolips, Gen, bits of twincest
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-28
Updated: 2015-05-28
Packaged: 2018-04-01 16:02:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4026118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Twilight_Shadow_Songs/pseuds/Twilight_Shadow_Songs
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>four pieces of what I imagine Gordon's life on Apokolips with his sister as his only friend probably went like, and one piece of his time on earth and a little moment with Vic Sage</p>
            </blockquote>





	The moments our souls die in

**Age Six**

He watched his father fall, and then his mother. Shot in the back as she ran towards them, her hand outstretched towards her children. She didn’t look towards her children from the concrete, there were no inspirational words, the bullet had killed her immediately. Glorious pressed back in the alley, his arms outstretched protectively to keep the bad men from getting near Amazing. He could feel her tiny thin fingers dig into his bony shoulder as they backed up to the dead end, his back pressing into her as she pressed into the wall. He hissed and growled at the men coming closer to them, more like a wild animal than a small child. 

The men were chuckling as they stepped on the dead bodies of the twins’ parents, one heavy boot crushing the children’s mother’s skull. At least, they were chuckling until one reached for Amazing. 

And then Glorious bit his fucking finger off. The man recoiled howling and another smashed the butt of his gun into the little boy’s head as Amazing screamed. Her fingers were wrenched from his shoulder as Glorious as flung into the side of the alley way. It should have killed him, but Glorious refused to let it. Amazing needed him, she always needed him. They had been born together and the six year old, already too familiar with death, was determined they would die together. 

When he woke up it was in a dirty, dingy room that smelled like rot and rancid, unwashed bodies. There was the sound of crying all around him but he was calm. Amazing was beside him, his hand firmly wrapped in hers as they lay together on a filthy cot. He curled into her and squeezed her hand tightly before falling back asleep. He didn’t know where they were, but he had his sister and she seemed alright, so that was good enough for him. 

 

**Age Twelve**

For maybe the sixth time that day Glorious was knocked onto his ass. It wasn’t that he didn’t try to give it his all in the arenas, but the knock to the head when he was six had apparently ruined his hand-eye coordination. No tests had determined a way to fix it. He had desperately tried to get around this disability with no luck. And recently he was even more desperate. Granny Goodness had taken him and a few other ‘late bloomers’ and told each of them they had two weeks to prove themselves, or they would be euthanized and used as food for the street-dwellers. He had to live, to be near his sister, who was doing much better than he was. 

Someone grabbed him and tossed him out of the ring. Glorious’ head rang as he lay there, feeling frustrated to the point of feeling a scream build up in his throat and chest, constricting him. After a few minutes he staggered to his feet. He knew that he had a little bit till his next fight and went to watch other ‘training sessions’ Barda was amazingly ruthless and feral. Everyone knew she was Granny’s favorite and protege, the next leader of the Furies. She snapped her opponent’s neck and Glorious flinched despite himself, hoping he never faced her in the practice rings. 

The next fight he watched was Jezebelle. She made his heart race and his face heat and he didn’t understand why exactly, but he was too nervous to talk to her. Jezebelle was well-known for not enjoying killing, though ironically was skilled at it. Her refusal to kill any of her opponents unless there was absolutely no choice was a constant annoyance to Granny Goodness, who probably would have made Jezebelle her favorite over Barda if the girl wasn’t so weak willed.

Jezebelle was holding herself tightly in one corner of the ring, looking unhappy as the crowd and her opponent jeered at her. But as Glorious watched her she changed and the blue-skinned girl practically sauntered to her opponent. The other backed up, a little confused as Jezebelle continued. Eventually the opponent was sufficiently distracted, and Jezebelle began attacking. The other child was caught off guard and while they fought back a little, they were no match with their confusion. Glorious left as Jezebelle got into yet another argument about what exactly ending a fight meant with Granny Goodness. Killing wasn’t always necessary, but when Granny was considering candidates for her Female Furies, it had to be. But the way Jezebelle had taken care of her opponent had given the boy an idea and if he was going to live past this month, he had to use it, and use it perfectly. 

Glorious’ next fight came almost before he knew it, but he was confident he was ready. He had ripped his ragged shirt up into strips and wrapped them around his wrists palms and feet and ankles. He was shirtless and had combed his hair into some semblance of something civil and walked into the ring with his shoulders back and a soft smile curving his lips. This immediately caught his opponent off guard and caused the audience to start quieting. The whole place went quiet when he walked right up to the bigger boy and draped his arms around the other’s shoulders as they stood chest to chest, Glorious beaming beatifically up at the other, who was starting to blush. 

“I don’t really want to fight” Glorious told the boy, rather interested in the gaping look he was receiving. “But we don’t really have a choice, and I can’t afford to lose” His smile dropped and eyes hardened into cold steel, the bigger boy realizing too late he’d fallen into a trap as Glorious slammed his knee into the boy’s crotch as hard as he could while wrenching the head back by his hair and forcing them both to the ground where he straddled the boy and slammed his fists into the weakly stuggling boy’s chest over and over until he started convulsing and choking in cardiac arrest. This actually shocked Glorious into scrambling backwards off of the body and watch numbly as the other twelve year old died from a heart attack. 

He realized then he didn’t really like killing, but also realized he liked the power he had had over the boy, and that he liked surviving more than he disliked killing. Two weeks later and a non-losing streak, he watched another child take his place in the group being culled, and he felt a sense of satisfaction as he stood beside Amazing, their hands tightly clasped together. She rested her head on his shoulder and he felt good and grateful to be alive. 

 

**Age Eighteen**

When he and Amazing had turned seventeen Granny had decided to use them to get information from possible traitors, or people whose knowledge was valuable. Or simply use them as bargaining chips for people considering allying with Apokolips for something. Seeing as the twins were both beautiful and soft-spoken, not to mention dangerously and deceptively gentle and kind, they made perfect tools for Granny’s purposes. Glorious had been with so many people of so many species and origins, their faces blurred. He read their files, did his research, and became the perfect little doll for each partner. 

Sex meant manipulation, ‘I love you’ meant manipulation and lies, kisses on the mouth never happened. The only person he could trust and open up emotionally to was his sister. They clung on the few nights they could spend together and simply soaked in the closeness. ‘I cherish you’ was their greatest term of adoration and kisses were small and shy and chaste and to show affection. They clung to the innocence of their relationship because nothing else in their lives was remotely innocent or safe. 

When his whatever partner he was with got too rough Glorious retreated to daydreams of when his job would be over and he could be with Amazing. Of course, this didn’t mean that he didn’t listen to his partners intently. It was still a job after all, and he had to do it well or risk death. And he was pretty sure that Amazing would go insane if he was killed. They depended on each other far too much. 

“When I overthrow Darkseid there will be a place for you in my courts!” said one of Darkseid’s generals grandly as Glorious listened intently. He kissed the neck of the traitorous woman (let it never be said Darkseid wasn’t equal in that regard; when he saw a clever individual he awarded them equally, regardless of gender or species) and ran a soft hand up her leg. “Mmm...you are so good to me” he told her happily as he filed away her name and the information for when he reported to Granny later. A few gentle prods in the right direction and she was soon spilling her plan. He smiled in a way he knew made his partners melt and mentally prepared himself for one last romp before he could call it a night-or, well, _day_ , now. 

He kept his coat wrapped tightly around his thin frame in an effort to keep the smell of sex and the woman’s awful perfume from his nose. There would be no opportunity to wash the filth off until he got to Granny’s orphanage, and even then the cold water never cleaned properly. But it was the best he could hope for so he had to be alright with it. Besides, after this he had a few hours with Amazing, so that was always good. 

He relayed all of the information with detached thoroughness to Granny Goodness, who gave him a hard but proud smile. It didn’t touch him, didn’t effect him. Her pride was insurance to survival. When he was done he brushed shoulders with Barda, who came in as he came out. It was her and her Furies’ job to destroy the woman and her followers. He was just the messenger. He and she barely spared each other a glance and that was quite fine with Glorious. He met Amazing in their room and they collapsed onto their bed, holding each other as tightly as they could. 

A few days later Glorious made his way to the residence of a new client and having quite forgot about the woman. Until he opened the door, saw his client dead on the floor and felt a knife at his throat as the door softly closed behind him. “You little snake” The woman hissed in his ear as his insides turned to ice water and his mind froze for a moment. How had Barda failed?! She never failed! His breath hitched in his throat and the woman clawed at his stomach, ripping his thin shirt up and apart before pushing him into the room, Glorious sprawling beside his former new lover. He rolled onto his back, not caring that he was rolling into a puddle of blood, and touched the raised marks on his chest as he got a good look at the angry and scorned woman. 

Wild eyes and an even wilder appearance gives good hint as to how her past few days have been and Glorious became frightened-well and truly terrified for the first time in years. The woman advanced on him and Glorious backed up desperately, smearing blood along the floor as he crawled backwards until his back hit the wall, the woman coming towards him all the while. “You little snake, you lying slut. A true backstabber, aren’t you? Have you even got a heart, or is it just a hole in your chest?” her words stung, a little. He pushed himself further into the wall as she crouched in front of him, one hand grabbing his neck and squeezing. His large eyes widened and soft breath came out in a whistling sound. The knife was drawn gently down the side of his face. 

“I have half a mind to cut out your tongue and turn you into my little private doll” The woman crooned to him. And that was the most terrifying thing he could comprehend, because it meant he would be parted from his sister permanently. His twin, his other half, his only grip on sanity that he had in this hell. He reached up and grabbed the wrist to the hand choking him as something felt like it was snapping in his mind and his tongue started tingling strangely. 

“Oh my dear, why would you cut out my tongue when I can do so much for you with it in my head?” his voice surprised him, it was stronger and more arrogant than usual, as well as seductive. He didn’t know what it was but it caused the woman to pause so he just went with it. “I can do so much for you! People do say I have a pretty mouth, and look at you, you obviously like listening to me. I can speak so much better if you remove your hand, by the way” To his utter shock and surprise, she listened and removed her hand, still listening intently. He cleared his throat and carefully moved away from the woman’s knife. She didn’t do anything.

“We could be unstoppable, you and me-could you kindly move away, thank you love-just unstoppable. Could you cut off one of your breasts? Oh hel _lo_! Fantastic! You see, that pain, that pain you feel, it’s what we could give to Darkseid, us two” He was watching in utter amazement as she did every command he said robotically as she listened to him with a spaced out look. This was a turn for the good. The longer he talked the bolder Glorious became. “Worship me” he said breathlessly, longingly. “Just for a moment, worship my body, please” he knew the ‘please’ was unneeded, but he felt obligated to add it in there anyway. 

The woman advanced on him obligingly and kissed up and down his throat reverently, running gentle and wondering hands up and down his body. His head rolled back on his neck for a moment as she continued servicing him, a nice departure from the norm. For a moment he felt wonderful with how she was acting towards him, but then the crushing realization that she really had no choice hit him like a falling wall and he stepped back from her. “You’ve been lovely dear, you really have. And I promise we can run away and overthrow Darkseid, but I need you to do a few things for me first” she gave him a glass of water, a hug, all of her money, and then slit her wrists and throat. All because Glorious Godfrey had simply asked her to. 

Glorious took advantage of the fact that the dead man’s residence had a shower with hot, clean water and soap and then helped himself to a set of clothes that weren’t thin and falling apart. They didn’t fit quite right but they were warmer and that felt great. He then went to the nearest place to eat and bought himself food. The feeling of power and cleanliness and being full was probably the best feeling in the world at that moment. He knew right then he could get off the planet and go anywhere he wanted, but obligations towards Granny Goodness, and his desire to keep Amazing safe prompted him to go back to the orphanage when he finished his meal. 

His story was barely out of his mouth before he was knocked out, his last sight a demonically grinning Granny Goodness leering as he fell. When he awoke, he thought he was in New Genesis, or the fabled legends of a place called heaven. However, the colors were too dark to be New Genesis, and the whispered stories of heaven said you felt no pain in that place. 

“Glorious? Glorious!” thoughts of heaven fled his mind “Amazing!” the twins grabbed each other and held on tightly, Glorious running worried hands over Amazing’s battered face as she touched his neck and put a hand on his flinching torso. They could communicate wordlessly through facial expressions alone, having perfected it out of years of practice in their stay at the orphanage and soon their stories were conveyed to each other. Glorious and Amazing buried their heads in each other’s shoulders as they held on still tighter to each other. Both teenagers frightened and confused out of their minds. Eventually they were pulled apart, much to their dismay, though they were allowed to hold hands. Glorious and Amazing were then forced out of the room they were in and down several halls until they were shoved into a room. A room with Darkseid. 

“Glorious and Amazing Godfrey, do you two know why you are here?” the thing asked, smiling sadistically over steepled fingers. Both teenagers shook their heads and Darkseid chuckled. “Amazing, my dear, do you mind telling me what happened a few hours ago?” Amazing glanced at her brother who slid his eyes to Darkseid and pursed his lips slightly, giving her the go-ahead. 

“A group of men were waiting for me when I went to my latest assignment” Amazing said softly. “They attacked me. Something...snapped...in my head and I got one man to turn on another until they were all fighting each other. I watched them all kill each other” she said, still amazed. Darkseid nodded and motioned for Glorious to relate his own story. “A former assignment was waiting for me, having killed my latest one. She was going to kill me so I...talked her into slitting her wrists and throat” he said. Darkseid laughed, causing the twins to flinch. 

“Interesting that twins have two halves of one power” He mused, seemingly to himself. “You, Amazing, have manipulation and you, Glorious, have persuasion. Together you could cause whole armies and nations to fall at your feet” He frowned and regarded the twins. “Which means, for the good of my throne, I cannot allow either of you to remain in one place together for very long” 

“No!” they shouted in unison, hands clutching each other so tightly the knuckles were white. Darkseid laughed again. “You will be allowed short, annual times together, as I have no doubt you would rebel if I didn’t allow it. Not to mention utter comfort and places in my court. However, Both of you will be too busy with your new jobs for spending much time together” Their hands relaxed slightly, as what Darkseid was proposing sounded reasonable, and leagues better than what they currently had. “You have two days” The Apokolips ruler decided. “And then you begin your new roles as members of my court” 

Glorious and Amazing spent the two days in a room straight out of one of their fantasies, eating the best food they had ever had in their lives and cuddling, trying to fit what should have been the rest of their lives together into two days. 

 

**Age Twenty-Four**

“Brother, did you hear? Barda defected with that one boy-um...Scott, I think? They’re on a planet called Earth, or so the stories say” Glorious and Amazing were on her couch, with Amazing feeding her obedient brother pieces of fruit as he held her in his arms. He made a humming sound around the fruit and swallowed before answering. “The New Genesis prince? I did hear that sister. It’s given Apokolips to go break the treaty with New Genesis” They both knew the rumors and were aware that they both knew, but talking about it was a chance to hear each other’s voices. They didn’t get to do this nearly often enough with their jobs and took advantage of it whenever they could. Glorious slipped a hand past his sister and snagged a piece of fruit, which he offered to her before she kissed his nose and caused them both to giggle like small children. 

Eventually they finished the little bowl of fruit and curled more securely into the couch together. “Brother, do you remember mother and father?” Glorious paused and nodded against the top of her head. “A little. I remember how mother held us and sang. I remember father tucking us in. I remember their deaths” Amazing clutched a hand into Glorious’ shirt and closed her eyes. “They were revolutionaries, did you know that? They did sort of what I do with raising people against Darkseid, but they didn’t work for him and they weren’t trying to crush anyone’s spirits” no, Glorious hadn’t known that. It made sense, really.

Their parents had been too loving for Apocolips, if he remembered right. He thought again of the fabled heaven and briefly wondered if his parents were there before Amazing kissing his mouth brought him out of his thoughts. He grinned and kissed her back. They fit themselves together on the couch so they could kiss and snuggle, and fall asleep together until Glorious was paged. The beeping woke him up and he reluctantly parted from Amazing’s safe arms. She watched him woefully and stretched a hand out, which he gripped tightly for a moment. It always hurt leaving, but in order to survive they both had to watch each other go. Though he always hated leaving, because it meant leaving Apokolips, taking on a different form, and brainwashing an entire planet into willingly giving themselves up to Darkseid. As glorious as Glorious was often told it was, he just found it tiring and depressing until he could go back to Amazing’s waiting arms, his safe haven.

 

**Age Thirty**

Earth was...incredible. Almost beautiful. Some areas reminded him of Apokolips and some made him wonder if New Genesis was anything like them. Because that was the incredible thing about Earth; it seemed to be a perfect mixture of both. And it was a place where Glorious’ own natural face and body, albeit in a weaker human version, could be used. It was also somewhere where his hand-eye coordination didn’t matter. If only it could have been understood, and then maybe he would have defected and joined Scott and Barda as protectors of the little planet. If only it was possible to safely bring Amazing, he never would have looked back at Apokolips or regretted his decision, but neither thing appeared possible and so Glorious, now ‘G. Gordon Godfrey’ remained faithful and loyal to Darkseid.

“Glor-er, _Gordon_ , come have drinks with me” He paused on his way home from his reporting job (it was a laugh and a farce but surprisingly simple, and his frustration and hatred of Apokolips was safely translated to the Justice League and was actually rather cathartic and therapeutic) when Barda in civilian clothes stopped him. He looked at her warily but since her husband was nowhere in sight and it seemed like a temporary truce, he accepted.

“Barda, I don’t want to fight you, you know that” he told her in their corner booth while waiting for the second round. He had stated beforehand that the most he would have was three drinks so as to not get drunk and accidentally trip over nothing and embarrass himself, “but do you think Darkseid isn’t closely watching Amazing right now?” She was now Amazing Grace just as he was now G. Gordon in order to better fit their current roles. Barda touched his hand gently. 

“Superman, Batman and I managed to save Supergirl from being my replacement amongst the Furies, Glorious. We could get Amazing” He shook his head. “He would have tightened security, you know that. And Amazing is valuable” he smiled bitterly at Barda. “You don’t think he knows I’m weak? I’ve always been the weakest person in the orphanage” he withdrew his hand from hers and looked down broodingly. “I’m unfortunately the messenger, Barda. The best you can do right now is make things hard for me to do my job. Because unfortunately your Justice League leader is Batman, and he’s human. He’s probably fallen for my message by now, even if he doesn’t believe the words” 

They drank the rest of their drinks in silence, Godfrey pretending that he didn’t notice her pitying gaze. When he got to his apartment (nice, but not nearly as nice as the one with Amazing in it) the faceless vigilante Question was poking around his living room. Question invoked feelings inside of him he hadn’t felt since Jezebelle-who had recently defected to New Genesis and had been murdered for her troubles. And there hadn’t been Amazing there to comfort him when he heard the news. 

Glorious and Question broke into each other’s apartments so much Glorious considered both apartments home, and both places good areas to search for the vigilante. “You’re not going to find secrets in my vases” he told the man humorously and Question (Vic really. Or Viktor as the man had revealed once while helping get Glorious loose from strings) straightened and looked at him. “No harm in looking” he said, and Glorious smiled a little more widely. “I do cherish our moments together” he told Vic warmly, feeling bold and a little terrified in using his strongest term of endearment on Vic, “But I need you to get out of my apartment. We both have work in the morning and I do feel you probably have more pressing matters than seeing if I water my flowers or not”

Vic struggled valiantly, Glorious could see him struggle, but in the end the vigilante headed towards the door. Glorious smiled sadly and touched his arm, forcing Vic to pause. “I wish I could turn it off, I do. I miss my old voice” the arm tugged out of his hand.

“Liar”

“Usually” he whispered as the door closed.

**Author's Note:**

> I have been wanting to write this since forever! It is a companion piece to 'Of Foxes and Crows' though the work is not needed to understand this one. It's written in a style I'm a little new to, but I absolutely love it right now, lol. I always figured Darkseid had something he was holding over Gordon's head, because the guy would more than likely defect if there wasn't. and well, since his sister is on Apokolips and is his twin and apparent best friend....I don't have a hard time imagining what Darkseid is controlling Gordon with. Or, really, _who_.


End file.
